Ram: Adarniya swami ji charan sparsh pranam, Swami ji this is my first question
to you. I am Ram. I used to obey and respect my parents, I still do,as they used to tell me I did in my life. I used to pray to God that I want to give them every happiness and I try I tried my best but when I got married my mother started torturing my wife for dowry. I still favoured my parents, but they keep on torturing her. It began from very first day after that I met with an accident. My parents blame same for my wife. I tried to explain them it is not right they blamed me that I am favouring my wife. Now I am in a rented house facing lot of problem. What should I do? Where was my fault? I still serve my parents with dedication, but I face lot of problem in life. Please guide me I am hopeless. Please help me.
Swami Ram Swarup: My blessings to you. You are always welcome, please. As far as
services to parents are concerned, you have been doing well. But justice cannot be ignored otherwise, a person will be liable to commit sins.
Actually, I would like to advice you to read some vedic literature, preferably my book- Vedas- A Divine light part III in which duties of husband and wife mentioned in Vedas have been clearly
briefed which need to be obeyed. Vedas tell to every family member to do at least agnihotra with ved mantras, daily and know about Yajyen.
You see, Yajurveda mantra 19/81tells that if a person is hundred years of age yet does not know the meaning of Yajyen, he is compared to an ignorant baby. Meaning of Yajyen is- devpooja, Sangatikarann and Daan.
Meaning of Yajyen
Yajyen means Devpooja, sangatikarann, daan. Devpooja means services rendered to five dignitaries who are called dev/devta. Those five dignitaries are- mother, father, atithi (guest who knows at least one Veda), acharya (learned of Vedas and yoga) and God. in addition, one should give respect and love to elders and shower love to younger ones. Sangatikarann means services given to a true religious master at one’s level best so as to gain the spiritual education in return. Daan means donation. Donation is to be given to the true spiritual master who is learned of Vedas, yoga philosophy and other holy granths and after doing true worship he should’ve gained full control over his senses, mind and perceptions. In addition, donation is given to real needy person. The said knowledge is attained in agnihotra, hawan and yajyen. Now, the yajyen means where the learned of four Vedas presides and Agnihotra is being conducted by offering aahutis in proper way under guidance of Brahma. Again, I may tell you that Brahma means alive, learned spiritual master who knows four Vedas, Ashtang Yoga Philosophy.
In your case, you are not even obeying Devpooja completely wherein services to parents, atithi and acharya-guru (learned of Vedas and ashtang Yog) are to be rendered. This problem is not only for you but nowadays and after mahabharat war, it has become a problem for almost all human-beings who do not know about Vedas and Yajyen.
So, I would advice you to please listen to Vedas at any place, either at local arya Samaj or from learned acharya of Vedas. Then you will be able to follow complete idea of Yajyen i.e., Devpooja, sangatikarann and Daan, which will give you immense knowledge to tackle family problems.
You see, dowry system is not allowed in Vedas. So, you must favour your wife in this matter. Secondly, accidents take place being God’s administration etc. So, nobody can be blamed. So, also please favour your wife but never tease your parents. You can oppose them but you can’t tease or insult your parents, say Vedas. It is also the duty of your parents to give happiness in return.
So, please advice, educate and oppose your mother, in case she tortures your wife baselessly. In any case, one should not loose patience, should not be demoralized but should bravely tackle the situation. Does not matter if you live in rented house. But, if your wife cooperates with you and is satisfied with your earnings and is able to meet with expenses well within your earnings then you are lucky. After sometime, the problem of your rented house and parents will be solved satisfactorily automatically.
However, you both should start Agnihotra with Ved mantras daily both times and to get blessings of God to solve problems peacefully because without blessings of God nothing can be achieved. You are advised to do the following-
Hard working, devotion, dedication, honesty, services to the parents and elders to follow eternal religion mentioned in Vedas, practice of Ashtang Yoga, discharging moral duties to get progress in education, science simultaneously with spiritualism like, daily havan, to be in contact with the learned Acharya, to get his advice, are some of the pious deeds which make the future bright and obliterate the sorrows, problems, diseases, etc.
One must wake up early in the morning for early morning walk and exercises, must sit on meditation and chant holy name of God, must be away from any addiction and non-vegetarian. Such pious actions lead to long, happy life and bright future.
The Gayatri mantra is as follows —
OM BHURBHUVAHA SWAHA TATA SAVITUR VARENYAM BHARGODEVASYA
DHIMAHI DHIYO YO NAHA PRACHODYAT
Meaning of Gayatri mantra stating each word is as follows. Its meaning is based on
Vedas and Sanskrit grammar. Grammatical hints are in short please.
Om has three Hindi words. Aa, Uu AND Ma. Aa is meant for Aakaar from which three
names of God are built, Viraat, Agni, and Vishwadi. From Uu = uukar from which
Hirannyagarbha, Vayu and Tejas names occur and Ma = makaar from which Ishwar,
Aditya and Praajyan aadi, holy names of God occur. Rigveda mantra 1/164/46 says
God is one but His names are several. But here OM the holy name of God is only
VIRAAT = Viraat word is made from dhatu ‘Rajrideeptau’ i.e., manifest. Therefore
Viraat means He who manifests the universe. As God manifests the universe, thus
Viraat is the name of God. Rigveda mandal 10, sukta 129 states that like potter
makes pot from clay, similarly God creates universe from non-alive matter prakriti.
Prakriti is unseen matter. From unseen matter, the whole universe is created in the
visible form. Science also says that matter is never destroyed but changes its form.
Suppose a paper is burnt, paper changes its form into ashes. Then ashes are crushed
and thrown in air. At this moment, the paper changed into ashes becomes invisible
but was never destroyed. Similarly the whole universe at the time of final destruction
is turned into prakriti i.e., into unseen form.
AGNI = From dhatu, “ANCHU GATI POOJANAYOHO” the word “AGNI is made. Its
meaning is: He who is a form of wisdom. “SARVAJAYEN” i.e., Omniscient. That is,
knows each and every atom of universe and even beyond universe. He who is to be
known, to be gained and is worshipful. So Agni is the name of God.
VISHWA = Vishwa word is made from dhatu, “VISHPRAVESHANE”. Its meaning is He
in whom the universe is entering or He who is entering the universe. So being
omnipresent, Vishwa is the name of God.
HIRANNYAGARBHA = i.e., ” JYOTIRVAYIHIRANYAM”. Its meaning is, who is the base
of all sun, etc., luminous lokas or He who is the living place of all luminous lokas.
VAYU = from dhatu, “VA GATIGANDHANYOHO”, vayu word is made. Its meaning is
He who holds, gives life and destroys and is the mightiest amongst all. So the name
of God is Vayu.
TEJ = from dhatu, “TIJA NISHANE”, the word Tej is made meaning He who is self
made and self-enlightened and gives light to sun, moon, stars etc. God does not take
light from anywhere but gives light to sun, moon, stars, etc. so the unbroken,
unobstructed/unproduced and eternal form of light is Almighty God and not sun,
moon etc. So the name of God is Tej.
ISHWAR = from dhatu, “ISH ASHWERIYE”, the word Ishwar is made. Its meaning is
whose knowledge is thoughtful and true and He who has unlimited wealth, fortune
and glory etc. Therefore the name of God is Ishwar. Here it is not out of place to
mention that soul (man/woman) has limited qualities and are dependent whereas
God is independent and has unlimited qualities that is why He is God.
ADITYA = from dhatu, “DO AVAKHANDANE”, Aditya word is made. Its meaning is the
one who cannot be broken into pieces and thus cannot be destroyed. So God’s name
PRAJAYEN (PRAGYA) = from dhatu, “JYEN AVABODHANE”, Prajayen word is made
meaning whose wisdom is totally without any misunderstanding and thus he who
knows every matter and behavior of whole universe without misunderstanding. So
God’s name is Prajayen. So here also it is not out of place to mention that illusion
can never attack on God and God is totally free from illusion.
BHUHU = “BHUHU ITI VAYEE PRANAHA” i.e., He who is the base of lives of universe,
is most beloved, even more than Prann i.e., breath. So Bhuhu is the name of God.
BHUVAHA= “BHUVAHA ITI APANAHA” i.e., He who is totally free from any sorrow,
and the soul removes his own all sorrows after coming in contact with Him. So the
name of God is Bhuvaha.
SWAHA = i.e., “SWAHA ITI VYANAHE” who is omnipresent in the universe and is
holding the same. So the name of God is Swaha.
SAVITUHU = He who creates the universe. So the name of God is Savituhu.
DEVSYA= who gives all pleasure/merriment, so the name of God is Dev.
VARENNYAM = He who is the most supreme and acceptable. God is most supreme
and acceptable for worship.
BHARGAHA = the purest entity (though God is formless, but finding no suitable
English word of Sanskrit word, “SHUDH SWARUPAM” the word entity has been used.)
TAT = i.e., the God i.e., of the purest entity.
DHIMAHI = i.e., we must hold (sort of meditation) because
YAHA = the God
NAHA = our,
DHIYAHA = mind(i.e., in our minds)
PRACHODYAT = by inspiration (fulfil the mind with wisdom)
“We meditate the God who is the base of lives’ of universe, totally free from any sorrow, omnipresent, creates the universe, gives all pleasure/merriment, most supreme and acceptable, purest entity; May the God enlighten our minds with wisdom by His inspiration”.
Here it is not out of place to mention that idea of a (one) Ved mantra is based on ideas of several Ved mantras. So in the above Gayatri mantra, there are three things —-
Bhuhu, Bhuvaha, Swaha, Savituhu, Bhargaha, Devsya are some qualities amongst unlimited qualities of God. These are called Stuti i.e., to say about God with His real qualities and not self made etc.
Secondly Dhimahi means meditation i.e., one should always sit in meditation and do hard and pious deeds for which he will have to study Vedas in full, while discharging moral duties towards family and nation.
Third and last is DHIYO YO NAHA PRACHODYAT. It is a prayer to God explanation of which is cited above.
HOW TO DO HAVAN
Please sit in the morning to perform havan. Havan must be in sunlight then it is more beneficial. Then half a bowl of fresh water with a tablespoon must be with you with small twigs especially of mango tree if possible, havan samagri, ghee, camphor and match box must be there with you. Please sit on sukh asan on four times folded blanket and blanket must be on mat.
Sukh asan i.e., sit on duly folded feet in comfortable position. Then first close your eyes and concentrate between two eyebrows and chant Gayatri mantra three times within heart and not by mouth. Then open your eyes.
Take one spoon of water in right palm. Chant this mantra, OM AMRITO UPASTRANMASI SWAHA and drink the water which you have put in your palm. Then again take the spoon of water in right palm then chant the next mantra, OM AMRITA APIDHANMASI SWAHA, and drink the water. Then again take the water in right palm and chant the mantra, OM SATYAM YASHAH SHRI MAYI SHRI SHRAYTAAM SWAHA, and drink the water. Then wash the right palm while sitting, with the same water kept in bowl.
Then put the twigs into havan kund with one piece of camphor and burn it. During this process chant the Gayatri mantra again and again till such time the fire is lighted sufficiently. Then chant the Gayatri mantra and at the last add the word Swaha and offer ghee with tablespoon, quantity equivalent to 4 to 5 drops. And if you are alone then also offer in fire pinch of havan samagri from your right hand’s finger and thumb avoiding forefinger. So this offering may be of 11 times, 21 times or 51 times as the time suits. It is the simplest way and I have not quoted the complete method of Yajna. The havan with Ved mantras are always offered as the best worship of God only please. Do havan daily and both times.
Procedure of Chanting
Please, start the day by chanting Gayatri mantra in the early morning sitting on suitable asan like Sukhasan, Siddhasan or Padmasan etc. concentrate on the point between two eyebrows which is called “Agyachakra”. The Gayatri mantra should be chanted along with its meaning both times. Also, please try to perform daily hawan even with Gayatri mantra. Then try to study any of my books daily and put up question if any. After 15 days chant the Gayatri mantra only thrice thereafter do the name jaap of Almighty God-“Om”. The jaap must be done daily by heart and not orally.
When Rani Jhansi, Maharana Pratap, Bhagat Singh and several brave persons and women did not get upset then why should you worry. With blessings of God, everything will be O.K. Soon.